I started meditating this week. The very idea of meditation is so odd to me; I'm just not a very "om" type of person (in fact I'm ashamed to say that a few years ago when a friend told me she'd just started meditating I dismissed it as sounding like a load of rubbish. I can't remember if I was rude enough to have actually said that to her or not; perhaps not as we're still good friends and on speaking terms). Instead I am the type of person who gets agitated over the slightest little thing, and will then drink a couple of mugs of max-strength coffee just to wind myself up even further, and then I'll go and burn off all that energetic, nervous frustration at the gym. I am constantly restless; so much so that whatever I happen to be doing at any given time, I'll waste time and energy thinking about all the other things I could be doing instead. I don't know that I've ever really relaxed, or even if I know how to.
Anyway, since January The Guardian has been running a great idea of a campaign called 'Get Happy', including fitness tips, sleep tips, recipes and recently, some meditation podcasts, with the stress on meditation just being something calming, with no traditional "om" or religious connotations. This fuelled a desire in me to get rid of some of my old ways if I possibly could; maybe it's me getting older but I'm a bit weary of the same old habits I tend to fall into. Sometimes I just want my brain to switch off. So I downloaded the podcasts and signed up to the meditation company's 'Take 10' guided meditation sessions, whereby you meditate for ten minutes every day and it improves your life immeasurably. Hopefully.
I have to say, so far it's proving to be a challenging experience. My first brush with meditation came when I decided to listen to the 'Sleep Meditation' podcast one night. It started well; the lovely sounding man with the low, soothing voice guided me through some simple exercises and I was just drifting off when the end of the podcast came and I was jolted wide awake by the suddenly unfeasibly loud "Thank you for listening!" message (I actually wonder if they did that as a bit of a joke? It's certainly something I'd have considered had I been releasing it myself).
My second brush with meditation came with the 'Walking Meditation' podcast, which I decided to listen to on my walk to the gym, in the hope that it might refresh me for the workout ahead. I strapped on my iPod and off I went. And it was calming; the same lovely sounding man instructed me to "pay attention to the soles of your feet as you walk..." This I duly did, but despite his warnings to also stay aware of my surroundings I a) trod in a pile of dogs' mess on the side of the road, and b) narrowly avoided being run over by a car reversing out of its drive. Needless to say, I arrived at the gym in a less than chilled state.
Undeterred (but podcasts abandoned for the time being), I decided to stay awake and safely at home in order to try the real thing; the guided 'Take 10' programme, which I started yesterday (Monday, quite unoriginally). Five minutes in, building work started up in the flat downstairs and I was treated to an assortment of loud drilling noises and hammer blows whilst trying to complete my relaxing and enlightening session.
Like I say, so far it's proving to be a challenging experience.
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