1. I went out for a meal with an old friend and her Mum, who will be seventy soon. This woman was so beautiful, active and vibrant that she made me look forward to getting older (good thing too, seeing as it's my birthday tomorrow). But she also made me feel a tiny bit sad when she said she'd married her husband purely because "he asked me...I didn't think about whether I wanted to get married or not; it was the done thing then, and I was getting on a bit in those days". I got the feeling that this woman could have ruled the world when she was younger, if she'd been as emancipated (and admittedly, as selfish) as we are now. Perhaps that's the same for a lot of the older ladies you see; those quiet, robust souls who have spent their lives taking care of people and whom we'll miss terribly when they're not around any more.
2. I realised what irks me about most sitcoms; it's the fact that the writers seem to think that the ultimate key to happiness is getting married and having the obligatory kids. I think far more sitcom writers should embrace the Seinfeld-ian "no hugging, no learning" rule. 'Curb Your Enthusiasm' is even better; it's just people getting on with their lives without questioning "what it all means" (whilst getting into amusing scrapes and foul-mouthed slanging matches, natch). Because there doesn't have to be a purpose to life. If there were, that would mean we'd all be obliged to work towards it. Let's not have one and see if the world stops.
3. WHY have all the papers been reporting the non-story about how David Cameron a) didn't tip a waitress in Italy and b) was wearing sandals without socks whilst in said restaurant? Is there anybody out there who actually cares about either of those things? If there are, may I suggest that they ask the nurse to increase their daily dosage?
4. I don't know why, but people who use that 'Tracker' thing on Facebook bug me royally. 'Clive is at Heathrow Airport'/'Clive is in Malaga'/'Clive is on the beach'*. FFS - some people do that constantly when they're away and all I can conclude from it is: is it a REAL holiday if all you can think about is telling a load of people you don't really know ALL about it? Have a few Screwballs and relax, before we start heading into the realms of 'Too Much Information'; i.e. 'Fairly certain Clive has just caught Chlamydia in Room 325 at the Sandy Bottom Hotel'.
(* Don't worry - I'm not so posh that I actually know anybody called Clive. He's just a loveable example).
5. I was watching 'Supersize Me' the other day and was reminded of how much the sight of an animated Ronald McDonald scares the willies out of me. This could be due to the fact that the very first nightmare I can recall having as a kid is that of him chasing me and shouting that he wanted to grind me up and put me in the hamburgers. Part of me has never recovered.
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